It is hard to believe it has been two
years since Betty and Jeri came home to us. I know I haven't posted
at all this year but now that the girls are an inherent part of our
family, life has pretty much just gone on as usual. Lately though as we have
approached our 2 year anniversary, I have been reflecting on our adoption journey, the scriptures that
spoke to me during that journey and God's character throughout:
Our faith is in the
almighty God and not ourselves, our resources or our circumstances.
God Calls:
Ephesians
2:10 “For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do
good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
When God calls, He often plants seeds
in our heart long before it is time for us to obey. Gradually the
seeds grow as He prepares us to accept His will and purpose for our
lives. Our call to adopt began when we moved into our current home
in 2007. It was then that He first planted the seed of adoption in
my heart and I began to pray about it and visit local adoption
events. He also placed many acquaintances and friends in our path
who had adopted and were willing to discuss their own journeys.
Next, He sent me to a women's conference where the topic was “Women
of faith “ and “Women who say yes to God.” He gave me the
desire to surrender my will to His so that my life might glorify Him.
Over the next few years, He brought 2 foreign exchange students, 2
girls from an African choir and an intern to temporarily live in our
home. Looking back, I see His hand in preparing us to open our lives
to a more permanent addition to our family.
God Confirms:
Matthew 19:5
“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be
united to his wife and the two will become on flesh.”
If God calls you to adoption and you
are married, He will also call your spouse. Because adoption would
involve both David and I, I continuously prayed for the next four
years that God would confirm His call by bringing David alongside
too. I didn't nag or conjure my spouse; I simply prayed. God
confirmed our call to adopt when in 2011, God spoke adoption into
David's heart and he responded willingly. We were now united through
faith to take the journey together.
God is Sovereign
Psalm 138:8,
“The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; your steadfast love, O
lord, endures forever...”
Even though in the past, God had
placed missions that reach vulnerable African children on our heart, we
let the greater expense for an Ethiopian adoption sway our decision
to begin the adoption process in China where only one and not two
trips to the country were required. But when God has a plan, He is
in control and His purposes will stand and be made known. He shut
the door to a China adoption in spite of our own efforts to try and
keep the door open. Both David and I had previous occurrences of
skin cancer and no type of cancer was permitted for a China adoption.
Finally, we realized it was He who was shutting the door in order to
direct us to the right path. Fortunately, He had previously guided
us to an agency that had a new Ethiopian adoption program in addition
to their China adoption program and we were able to proceed without
changing agencies.
Isaiah 64:4
“Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye
has seen any God beside you, who acts on behalf of those who wait on
Him.”
Do you ever have trouble waiting on
God's timing? I know I do. But God does not want us to doubt His
goodness. He wants us to trust in Him, wait on His timing, walk in
surrender and not try to make things happen independently of Him
during times of trial and delay. There is much waiting in the
adoption process. Governments change their process, close doors to
their country, process less kids through court, or other problems
arise. We had our own challenges of waiting due to health problems.
We also had friends whose adoptions fell through when their matched
child was claimed again by some family member or friends whose court
or embassy appointments were delayed for long periods of time for
various reasons. But through it all, God is in control. His timing
is always perfect and looking back on all these events for both us
and our friends, His purpose and hand can be seen in the delays and
disappointments. It has been said before, “God promised it, He
will do it, that settles it.”
Psalm 138:8 “The Lord will
accomplish what concerns me.”
God grows our faith and dispels our
doubts
John 13:7 “Jesus replied, “You
do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”
During the dossier phase of our
adoption, I was diagnosed with breast cancer (Praise God for His
providence of redirecting us from China to Ethiopia!) The diagnosis
shook my confidence in God's call. Even though I knew nothing could
stand in the way of God's plans for us, I was confused and plagued
with doubts. Had I heard right?
John the Baptist also had his
confidence shaken when his expectations did not match God's plan.
John, who knew Jesus was the promised Messiah, had doubts when he
found himself in prison for doing God's will. Furthermore, He
thought the promised Messiah was to take the throne of David and
deliver the Israelites from Roman oppression and rule. He could not
see the big picture of God's plan. Yet John took his uncertainties
to the true source and sent his disciples to Jesus to confirm that
Jesus was in fact the long awaited Messiah.
So I also took my uncertainties to the
Lord in prayer and began pouring over my prayer journals of the past
few years for answers. That same day, God dispelled all my doubt by
encouraging a friend to send me a poem entitled “A Bend in the
Road” by Helen Steiner Rice.” After reading the poem, peace and
joy settled over me: I new without a doubt that cancer was not the
end of the road, God had a bigger vision, my cancer was only a bend
in the road and the best was yet to come. I also received a call
that day regarding our dossier was complete and ready to submit. God
is so much bigger than our circumstances. When we listen, He will
provide truth, life, direction and comfort.
2 Corinthians 5:7 “We live by
faith, not by sight.”
Exodus 6:1 “Now you will see what
I will do...”
God provides
Ephesians 3:20 “Now to Him who is
able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think...”
When I first started to think about
adoption, I looked into domestic adoption. My own financial
insecurities came over me and I determined we could not afford an
international adoption. (Matthew 8:26 “You of little faith, why
are you afraid?”) Fortunately, He confirmed through David that
international adoption was indeed His call for us; so we stepped out
in faith. Do you believe God still does miracles? I do because we
witnessed one firsthand. Not only did God miraculously provide all
we needed for the 35K adoption of two girls but He also provided
enough for our boys to travel with us on the first trip. We were
overwhelmed by His provision.
2 Corinthians 12:9 “But He said
to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made
perfect in weakness.”
During the adoption process I also had
fears of my ability to parent and homeschool two more children.
After all, I was advancing in age. But when God calls, He equips.
He has given me just what I need each day to take the next step of
faith. He has given me encouragement to obey. He has given me the
power to do what He has called me to do. To draw near to God through
faith in Jesus is to enter into God's high and joyful purpose for my
life.
God reveals
2 Samuel 22:29, “You are my lamp,
O Lord, the Lord turns my darkness into light.”
This is one of my favorite parts of
our journey. Our original intent was to adopt one little girl,
around the age of 4 or 5. But God, gave David a dream that not only
would we be adopting an older girl but two instead of just one. Then
a few weeks later at an adoption class, we met someone adopting a 7
year old girl that had been on their agency's waiting child list. I
told them I had looked at our agency's list in the past but it had
always been just boys. However, God placed this person in our path
at just the right time so that we would take another look at the
website. When we got home that day, we clicked on waiting kids and
up popped our beautiful daughters, ages 6 and 8. The Lord revealed
to our hearts at that very moment, these were the girls for us. This
was such a blessing and comfort to me as my surgery was 3 days later.
We couldn't be matched with the girls until I had a medical
clearance from the doctor but God kept anyone else from being matched
with them for the one and a half months more that we had to wait for
medical clearance. And do you think it a coincidence that the
meaning of our girls last name was “My Hope?” Certainly, He is
worthy to be praised!
God teaches
Habakuk 3:19
“The sovereign Lord is my strength, He makes my feet like the feet
of deer, He enables me to go on the heights.”
Why did God allow such a rough road
when we were being obedient to His call? My friend gave me a helpful
book during this time called “Hinds Feet in High Places.” The
book is about the journey each of us must make before we can live in
high places. In our journey, we had to travel through the desert to
grow in faith and dependence on God before we were ready to reach the
heights of getting our new daughters. During this time of waiting,
God showed me that each day was important to what He had to show me
and teach me. God taught me to accept with joy all that He allowed
into my life and lay my own will on His altar.
A quote from Joni Eareckson Tada'
whispered hope into my heart during our time in the desert and
summarizes well what we learned along our journey. “If you are
operating in God's general will – that is, if you are living in the
power of the Spirit and obeying by faith the commands of God already
made clear in scripture, you can confidently move forward to pursue
your deepest desires, for it is God who put them in your heart. And
once you are rolling, God can grab the steering wheel with the strong
arms of His will to direct you to exactly where He wants you to go.
Finding the Lord's specific will for you may mean pushing down the
narrow line until you hit a dead end; but at that point, God will
open a door so wide that you won't be able to see around it, only go
through it.”
Revelation 3:8 “I know your deeds.
See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut. I
know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and
have not denied My name.”
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